…with yourself, all over again!
When my video friends (clients) watch themselves for the first time on the ‘big’ screen they are either totally at ease with themselves or they’re like:
“Uh, this is what I sound like?
I had no idea my mouth is so crocked.
OMG, I look so old, can you take my wrinkles away? Can you make me look younger, thinner, cut off my double chin?”
I totally get it – because I’ve been there, all the way and back again.
As their chosen videographer I make sure my lovely clients get the full on – soft lights – long lens treatment. We also practice voice tonation, eye contact and posture.
Our final video version is always lovely. After so and so many takes my clients resign to the fact that beauty is in the eyes of the beholder. What they, themselves see, we, the viewer don’t. Where they see wrinkles, we see wisdom and experience.
I can make you look and sound good, but I can not make you love yourself. The same rang true when I ran my coffee shop: I can teach anybody how to make a cappuccino- but I can’t teach you likability, personality, empathy, friendliness, charisma, personality. You either have it or you don’t.
You either accept your look and go with it, change it if you’re able to or live a life full of doubt, despise, jealousy and envy – which, btw. I don’t recommend.
And here comes the irony of this blog post: I just made this big mouth, loud statement about loving oneself…and earlier this month yours truly had a very hard time nurturing this love for herself.
You see, the month of April saw my four video events and workshop cancelled due to the corona virus and I found myself having more time on my hands than normai. Therefore, I decided to start posting on my YouTube channel (Motherpreneur TV) again. The following is my first appearance in years, literally:
Guess how long it took me to be fully confident, happy and proud of these three minutes? Are you guessing?
Now, guess again.
Not full days of course, parts of each day, too many hours to tell you about. It was excruciating, to say the least. When did my neck decide to resemble a turtle? Have I always had so many lines around my eyes and forehead?
Holy Moly, if I wanted to be part of the big wide online world again, with gusto and confidence, I needed to swallow a sip of my own medicine: I needed to fall in love with myself again. I needed to love the 2020 version of Christina.
Every decision we make starts first in our head: We have to make the decision to feel good – to look good – to be successful – to make a stand – to change careers – to get back into shape – to get a divorce – to become a better cook etc. You get the point.
So I started with the obvious: I decided today is the day to film the best version of myself. I played around with make – up, added another cover to my soft box light, changed the angles and most importantly, put on the blue turtle neck sweater, then pressed record…and the rest, as they say, is history.